Picky Eaters Archives

Develop Healthy Eating Habits by Changing your Kitchen Defaults – Part 1

January 2, 2020 by Chris Leave a Comment

Develop Healthy Eating Habits by Changing your Kitchen Defaults – Part 1

Our little guys tried more varieties of food before they turned five than Karen and I have before turning twenty-five. One reason is availability. Specialty foods have gone mainstream so a Slim Jim has to cozy up to sheep jerky and pomegranate is about as exotic as Peanut M&Ms. Taking advantage of variety has really aided in developing our boys’ robust palate.

We’ve been asked how we go about designing our meals as well as what we buy at stores. This is a two-parter since Karen has a professional background in picky eating and I’m just a reformed picky eater who tries to keep it healthy.

He had a dream to have crackers with four dips for breakfast.

Here are some default settings I generally follow. The first thing to make your unhealthy foods yourself. If I crave a muffin or brownies we try to make it from scratch. So we can appreciate the work that it takes to make it and what ingredients it takes. We have cookies in the house but they’ve not made by Nabisco. Cooking your own food, even if not totally healthy, will give you knowledge that translates to healthy cooking.

Another default is planning your meal around the veggie. We always have proteins in our meals, but ensuring the vegetable is cooked in an appealing way ensures the kids get the nutritional benefit. This could mean leaving some foods raw, like snap peas or bell peppers or steaming broccoli or boiling peas. I also invited other veggies in every recipe. We add cooked sweet potato to pizza crusts or adding green vegetables to store-bought mac n cheese. Sneaking veggies into foods is all the rage and half the pasta aisle seems to be made up of noodles from everything from spinach to seaweed.

Tips & Tricks

Here are a few other tips/tricks and defaults we turn to make cooking and planning with kids.

A treat at the supermarket is letting the kids pick their own fruit. They’ve had fun picking out dragon fruit, jicama, and other strange-looking fruit that just wasn’t available twenty years ago.
If kids pick it, pack it, stir it, chop it and add it, chances are they’ll eat it.
Never toss out bananas. The darker they get, the sweeter they’ll taste in a smoothie. Freeze them. The kids love designing their smoothies. They’ve used just about everything in the fridge and spice rack.
Never tell them it won’t taste good, even if it’s a cumin, basil, banana, and watermelon smoothie.
Pack your pancakes with fruit and greek yogurt. I don’t like greek yogurt but find it pretty good if it’s been hidden in something baked.
Add frozen berries to cooked oatmeal to cool them down faster.
Not just pancakes use greek yogurt in everything. It’s super versatile and adds a bit of tanginess to Italian dishes. It’s also a great way to stave off your appetite at night.
Only use half the Mac n’ Cheese additives in boxed mac and cheese. Use the extra additives in your burger mix for a little extra cheesiness.
It’s okay to toss unhealthy foods. If you wouldn’t feed it to your dog, it’s better off in the bin.
Use a calorie counter. It’s a good practice to check the cumulation of the foods you’re taking in as a baseline — no need to do this every day. Many apps can handle this, and you don’t need to be obsessive about making it happen. It’s a good idea to check on occasion what nutrients you may need help with or if you’re taking in more sugar than you realize.
Our favorite snacks – unsweetened applesauce, carrots, greek yogurt, snap peas, pb&j, naked popcorn, bell pepper slices, string cheese, as well as every type of nuts we can find.

The thing is, keeping it healthy has gotten harder. Our rules haven’t changed much since they were two, but they are much more independent at five. Now they don’t always think rules apply, and that’s perfectly fine. They will still go to the fridge and pull out snap peas or finish off a pint of strawberries at a sitting because that’s what they like and it makes them feel good

We’ll be back soon with Part 2 – Grade School Snaking

Dinner Time Dichotomy

April 11, 2017 by Karen Leave a Comment

Dinner time is no easy feat for families with children. It starts the day they’re born when they sleep all day and then become colicky when it’s time for the parents to eat dinner. Then comes toddlerhood when they do everything with the food but eat it. Food is on the floor, the ceiling, in their hair and every crevice that’s impossible to clean but not in their mouths. Preschoolers aren’t much better; this is when they decide to assert their independence by saying, “I don’t like it.”

It’s no wonder parents wave the white flag and become short order cooks by making separate meals each night. One meal that ensures Child #1 will eat and another meal that Child #2 will eat, plus one for the parents. It feels like it takes three meals in one night for it to feel like a successful dinner.

Successful family dinners are not meant to please everyone. The reality is to plan and cook one well-balanced meal, regardless of your families response (rejection). Here’s how:

Be authoritative and set the menu, allowing input from family members.
Family-style meals, keeping it simple.
Stick to the meal time structure, if the kids choose to pass on dinner remind them it is their choice not to eat.
If your child chooses something else, have them make it themselves. Remember, being authoritative means you provide the what (nutritious foods), they choose the how much and whether not.

The more you accommodate personal preferences, the more unsuccessful mealtime becomes. The variety of meals shrinks and parents quickly fall into a rut. Parents who cater to each family member inadvertently create a meal time dichotomy of we eat this, and the kids eat that. If you’re finding yourself in this stressful situation then I highly recommend the following resource:

Fearless Feeding is a book about childhood nutrition that will calm and empower parents, provide step-by-step feeding guidance at every child development stage and teach parents the skills they need to get healthy meals on the table fast.

Bon appetite!

Go Strong Mamas!

BONUS: We love Gordon Ramsey’s YouTube channel, he’s generous with tips and advice as well as incredible recipes. Here’s a recent one where he shares some delicious lunch recipes for kids.

Getting Kids to Try New Foods

February 20, 2017 by Karen 1 Comment

Getting kids to try new foods is no simple feat. From neophobia (fear of new foods) to erratic appetites and asserting their independence, kids will find a reason to say, NO. Trying to change the routine of hearing your child say, “No, I don’t like that” or “I’m scared of green beans” entails introducing an improved replacement routine.

The practice of food exploration, without the expectation of actually eating, provides your child the opportunity to create neural pathways required to accept new varieties of food. In other words playing with food is learning how to eat.

Afraid of wasting food? If you’re afraid of wasting food, then your demands are too high and you run the risk of overwhelming your child. Food exploration should involve a single food item or a minimal amount. Food exploration for younger babies and toddlers is known as developmental food play but as kids grow, food exploration needs to become more sophisticated. Here is an example of a food exploration routine we play on a weekly basis in our house. It keeps the neural pathways pruned for developing palates, as well as our own.

We call it the MYSTERY FOOD GAME.

1. To play the Mystery Food Game, go to a market with an extensive produce section.

2. Have your kids pick a food they are unable to identify from the peripheral of the grocery store.

3. If your children are new to this game, establish that there is no expectation to eat it.

4. Take it home and google the food. Watch an intriguing video (thanks to youtube), and learn about the food.

5. Have your kids interact with the food by cutting, peeling, or opening. Whatever interaction opportunity the food presents on its own.

The boys exploring Jamaican Ugli Fruit

The “Mystery Food Game” plays many roles in fostering a positive relationship with food for your kids. First, it empowers them to make the choice and be in control. They love and need both of those things when it comes to trying new food.

Kids learn to shop the peripheral where all the nutrient dense foods live. In turn, kids receive more nutrition! Kids who don’t feel the pressure to eat are more relaxed, feel safer and are more willing to eat. Given time and repeated exposure kids learn how to eat through their senses.

Learning to eat becomes a positive experience. When the expectations are lifted the stress goes with it. When kids feel relaxed, appetite increases. When kids feel stressed, appetite decreases. Learning about new food prepares them. Kids who interact with their food learn how to accept the new food through their senses. Hence, developing their neural pathways to accept a variety of flavors!

If you’re reading this and thinking, my kid won’t get past step 2 of this game. You may want to check out TINY TASTES developed by Dr. Lucy Cook in the link below. TINY TASTES involves giving children a taste of a very small amount of a new or disliked food every day for up to 15 days in exchange for a sticker reward.

GO STRONG!

http://www.lucycooke.net/tiny-tastes

Dr. Lucy Cook is a Chartered Psychologist and Child Feeding Specialist, her research focus has been on children’s eating behavior. Her principal area of interest is the development and modification of children’s eating habits with a particular focus on developing interventions to help parents of children with eating and feeding difficulties.

Address the Social and Emotional Impact of Food for you and your Kids

January 22, 2016 by Karen 2 Comments

What is Food’s Social and Emotional Impact?

Therapists assess a child and family in feeding therapy and address their fundamental needs. The first few weeks of therapy focus on educating the family and collaboratively agreeing on a plan that will lead to success and eventually discharge from services.

Basic SOS (Sequential Oral Sensory developed by Dr. Kay Toomey) feeding protocol is a 12-week program. Most kiddos fly right through not always needing the full 12 weeks. Then there are what I call my curve ball kids. The kids who are not necessary text book cases and end up teaching me just as much as I have taught them. I love these kids, they are so brave.

There are many more components to feeding than just oral motor and sensory. That brings me to the basic things that I was taught as a student. When looking at feeding you look at 3 things.
1. Functional (are they physically able to do it?)
2. Sensory (what aversions are they responding to or avoiding?)
3. Behavioral ( what are the behaviors associated?)
I’d like to add a 4th aspect of feeding to review

Social and Emotional Relationship with food

This 4th aspect of feeding impacts all of us, beginning to form as young as 6 months of age. This is the age when feeding becomes a LEARNED BEHAVIOR. I capped and bolded for all you parents who are picky eaters yourselves; for all the parents who like things neat and tidy and wipe their babies hands and mouths as soon as they get messy. Also, for all the parents who overreact (guilty of this myself) to protective mechanisms such as, gagging and coughing that happens (and you want it to in order to know these protective mechanisms are present and functioning ) when babies are learning to eat solid foods and different textures and consistencies. It is a deeply rooted thing that includes healthy eating, emotional eating, binge eating, poor self-images, traditions, cultural and economical differences.

Our relationship with food is contingent on the first 3 factors listed (functional, sensory, behavior) but it is also highly influenced by our families, peers, culture, and environment. The language surrounding food is critical for both vocabulary and developing perspectives on variable food items. I remember improvising the language with one of the twins favorite picture books by Sandra Boyton. The original image was of a Hippo saying, “Ew, broccoli stew”……in my version the hippo said, “Mmmm, broccoli stew!!”

My boys actually had tantrums when the other drank the “broccoli juice” from the bottom of the broccoli bowl at dinner. They read my version of that book since they were 6 months old. They are listening and learning very early on and developing their relationship with food in many different mediums of learning. They include language (both written and verbal), observation (watching family & peers), environmental (opportunities for mass exposure to a variety of foods) and most importantly, experience (being active participants in selection, manipulation/play and tasting); notice I did not mention eating. Eating is at the very top of all the layers of foundation a child has to experience before getting to the last step of eating.

Developing a positive relationship with food means acknowledging all the factors detailed above. We addressed the language piece, be hyper-aware of what you are saying and what others are saying about food in the presence of your children. Observation includes your child watching you willingly trying new foods. Buck up ma and pa, take a bite and keep a smile on your face, it’s called good parenting.

Environment is your pantry, your refrigerator, and your local eateries. Try to provide fresh and healthy choices and keep the snacks you don’t want them to have out of the house. They’ll get ample opportunity to snack when they’re out and about. Home is the place where they are developing their palate the majority of the time. When they are surrounded by fresh and healthy food, their palate develops a preference for those bountiful flavors. Synthetic carbohydrates become blah or overly sweet to their palate. It’s like tasting the notably marked difference between Aunt Jemima pancake syrup and fresh tapped Vermont Maple Syrup.

Experience is everything in terms of forming relationships, keep them positive. Acknowledge Developmental Food Play Skills, they’re messy and an integral piece to forming a positive relationship with food. Include your kid’s input, thoughts, and ideas regarding what everyone should eat as a family. When kids are included in the planning aspect for meals, it provides them with the control they need to feel safe with new foods. Kids love to be in “control”, allowing them to assume the control role in the initial stages prevents them from asserting their control at the final stage (eating) by saying, “no, I don’t like that“.

A good place to start is examining your own relationship with food. It’s a dynamic process, examine the layers and identify the components you feel need attention to develop a positive relationship with food. It’s good for your body, brain, and soul!

GO STRONG!

Why Picky Eaters LOVE McDonalds

April 24, 2014 by Karen 4 Comments

Okay put your guards down fellow Mom’s. I’m not about to knock down McDonald’s or make you feel guilty about feeding your kids from McDonald’s. I’m only trying to drive home a HUGE point that is always overlooked and often poorly fostered; the RELATIONSHIP you and your family has with food.

McDonald’s spends a huge amount of money and dedication focusing on your relationship with their food. First, they make it extremely stress free and convenient. You don’t even have to get out of your car AND if you do, there’s typically a wonderful indoor playground for your kids to enjoy. Your kids get to see pictures of their food before they eat it. The food looks exactly like the picture, you’re kids are getting what they expect. No surprises, except for the toy that comes with the meal.

The meal itself, whether it is a burger or chicken nuggets is comprised of the easiest oral motor task for your child. Everything that is offered in a McDonald’s kids meal is already processed and super easy for your child’s mouth to break down. The healthy addition of the apples come peeled, no skin to break down and all one color. From a sensory perspective, McDonald’s is a picky eaters dream come true.

Visually, there are no surprises.
Olfactory, everything smells the same.
Tactile, everything is super easy to chew and doesn’t change as you chew it.

YES, McDonald’s has done their research and has a super fun, relaxed, trusting relationship with your child and your family. You’re relaxed, your child is eating and everyone is happy at McDonald’s.

Now, compare your eating at McDonald’s relationship with your eating at home relationship.

You come home from work (tired and stressed) have to make dinner, entertain your kids, acknowledge your pets and FINALLY try and vaguely communicate with your better half ALL AT THE SAME TIME!!! Impossible not to be stressed. Kids may be snacking because they just can’t wait and you just need to get dinner on the table. Once you get to the table there could be a variety of scenarios that families fall into just to get a civilized meal. Some families make totally separate dinners for their kids, some appease them with Ipad or TV just to get them to stay at the table, some have their kids stay at a “kids table” or even eat separately and at different times. Most of the time, parents are stressed because their kids either want to play with the food, comment on how “yucky” it is, outright refuse, or play with it, anything BUT eating. Grrrrrr

See the difference? VAST isn’t it.

Now, I hope I have your attention on the importance of your families RELATIONSHIP with food.
Don’t worry, the answer isn’t trying to replicate McDonald’s at home BUT you do have to work on making it fun and relaxed. Here are some tips on how to do that:

1. Have your children participate with the preparation. You can do this at any age and with more than one child at a time. They will be engaged and first hand preparing their sensory system for what’s to come.

2. Create an ambiance, lighting and music do set the mood. The more relaxed and happy you are the more engaged your child/children are at the table, so pour that glass of wine!

3. Serve family style, let them be an active participant on what goes onto their plate. They’ll surprise you.

4. Don’t sweat it if they refuse. Acknowledge what they’ve eaten already and know that every child everywhere eats dinner only about 1/2 the time. They can always have something afterwards…this is okay. Remember you’re fostering a positive relationship. Keep it relaxed and positive.

5. Let them get up when their finished or just not eating. Avoid the battle, keep it positive.

6. Forget about table manners, let your kids have fun and go hog wild some times. I mean it, food fights and all. These are kids, not adults. Table manners come much later. Yes, we let our kids pour and throw and wear their food. It’s messy so be prepared but your kids relationship with food will be positive and confident. As always, remember that your child has to go through the STEPS of eating and getting messy and playing with their food is how they get to the final step of eating. See previous post for reference of the all important and critical STEPS of eating.

Did you Know? There are more libraries than McDonalds. So forgo the golden arches and make a weekly trip to the library instead.